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Tuesday, May 15, 2007

A little thing but it annoys me!

The postman has just been and I'm still getting birthday cards which is lovely of course. My eldest sister's card has just arrived but she ALWAYS addresses it to Mrs. Hub3's Christian name then our surname.

So lets say Hub3's name was Charles, which it is not, and our surname was Smith, which it isnt, anything she sends me is addressed to Mrs. Charles Smith. Now I KNOW in days gone by this was correct, but we don't live in those days now and I am sick of it! I have been married to three different husbands from the age of 19 and am now am 50 so for 31 bl**dy years she's been addressing envelopes with their names and not mine on them! And I haven't dared tell her I HATE it!

posted by Faith @ 7:52 AM  

16 Comments:

  • At May 15, 2007 8:09 AM , Blogger UN PEU LOUFOQUE said...

    No I am sorry dear one is always addressed as one's husbands goods and chattel hence Just take it as a small price to pay for eh pleasure of having husband number 3. I am sure he is worth it!

     

  • At May 15, 2007 8:09 AM , Blogger Cait O'Connor said...

    I agree with you wholeheartedly, wouldn't stand for it!
    Caitx

     

  • At May 15, 2007 8:09 AM , Blogger Pondside said...

    Oh dear. I think we'll either have to leak this page to her or you're going to have to sit her down for a heart-to-heart. I'd hate it too - we've come a long way from the days of being our husbands' chattel.

     

  • At May 15, 2007 8:15 AM , Blogger Blossomcottage said...

    I'm with you all the way, current husband would be with you sister all the way!!
    Its so funny the things that one person regards as correct and another regards as" not done and common"
    My mother-in-law always asks how I am with great gusto and warmth but woe betide you if you dare tell her anything other than very well thank you!! I find it very strange amongst family.

    Blossom

     

  • At May 15, 2007 8:33 AM , Blogger KittyB said...

    Yes, it's very correct in an old fashioned way. I hate it too, I don;t even like being called "Mrs xxxxx" cos that's my mother in law. I took my husband's name of course, but just hate the word Mrs. I have a name, and it's not Mrs!

     

  • At May 15, 2007 8:37 AM , Blogger annakarenin said...

    Not only do I hate that but I also hate the fact that because I am married I don't seem to be allowed to use Ms (the whole point of Ms is that it is equavalent to Mr i.e no label. People assume you use it only if you are a Miss but embarressed that you are to old to be one or that you are divorced der!!!. Some official documents don't even allow it, absurd in this day and age. My bank card etc always have Mrs even though I repeatedly inform them I am Ms. Also once when I was dealing with a complaint about a cd player I bought when I was a student and single, the company insisted on addressing every letter to a Mr R Leader rather than Ms, very annoying since that is my dad and he had nothing to do with it. Even when they phoned my house they would ask for Mr leader. Urrrgghh

     

  • At May 15, 2007 9:10 AM , Blogger elizabethm said...

    yep, i hate it too. i didn't even take my husband's name and didn't think i was being weird although i have now spent years explaining myself so clearly was. my lovely mother ignores this when writing to me so i just let it go over my head and smile wryly at the envelope!

     

  • At May 15, 2007 9:44 AM , Blogger Suffolkmum said...

    My grandmother always does the same thing, I am always 'Mrs R N-, and occasionally when she has sent me a little cheque for my birthday (usually £2.00, bless her!), she makes it out to R!!! Maddening but I let it go as she is in her 90's. I never intended taking my husband's name, but when it came to it I MUCH preferred his surname to mine - I'd always hated mine. Plus I like having the same surname as the children.

     

  • At May 15, 2007 10:48 AM , Blogger The Country Craft Angel said...

    It is infuriating isn't it?

    Makes me smile though Faith, to think of you not daring to tell her!! I always imagine you as someone not to be messed with and would tell her straight!!

    warm wishes
    xx

     

  • At May 15, 2007 10:57 AM , Blogger Grouse said...

    Perhaps if you started to address your mail to her to: The Daughter of My Father......?

     

  • At May 15, 2007 11:02 AM , Blogger Grouse said...

    Forgot to say 'thank you' - you were spot-on, left a comment under your comment then thought, why on earth would you go there again?

     

  • At May 15, 2007 11:29 AM , Blogger countrymousie said...

    Correct form I am afraid. I imagine it will die out eventually - though I guess it is still taught in English at public schools and such. Showing my age now but I used to work for someone who was very much Old School and I had to be up to speed on all this etiquette malarky. Its a habit I am still in. I will remember if I ever have to write to you though Faith to use your name. love mousie.
    PS Could I have a Card pulled for me - I need some strength here at the moment as The Heiress, my Angel, is very poorly with measles.

     

  • At May 15, 2007 11:38 AM , Blogger Exmoorjane said...

    Aaaghh, this drives me mad. I know it's (old) correct form and what have you but really! My MIL does it too - I'm Mrs Adrian blah blah.... I blow up even more when reading The Field and mags like that where they insist on it - it's just so incongruous. I use Ms if I can - but it all gets confused as I use two surnames already!

     

  • At May 15, 2007 11:57 AM , Blogger WesterWitch/Headmistress said...

    Well I think we should all sign and send her a cyberpetition . . . . it is something I hate as well . . .grrrrrrrr.

     

  • At May 15, 2007 1:04 PM , Blogger jackofall said...

    Get your husband to write back to her saying how dare you imply I'm a woman!

    Kettyb said she took her husband's name 'of course', but there is no legal reason to take the man's name and there are many married women, elizabethm being just one example, who do not have their husband's surname.

    My sister-in-law does the same as your sister, and it doesn't bother UPL.

     

  • At May 15, 2007 1:36 PM , Blogger KittyB said...

    On the subject of 'Ms', our careers teacher told us it was solely for lesbians (!). My husband's forename initials are MS so on our bank account which is all in capitals, we are MR MS & MRS ... which makes us look like a saucy threesome!

     

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